Raising Grandchildren
Tips for Grandparents Raising Grandchildren
Finding Balance
Raising Children is a Huge Responsibility- Finding Balance
It can take a toll on anyone…especially, grandparents, And with other commitments such as work or caring for a spouse or in-law, grandparents have a lot on their plates. Finding balance between these life challenges is essential for maintaining physical, emotional, and mental well-being.
First Two Steps
Identify priorities.
Next, establish a routine.
This will take time and patience.
Make Adjustments
Grandparents may need to adjust their work hours or arrange for childcare to ensure you have things covered. Talk with your employer. Let them know your situation. Some employers have programs or connections to support. Take your time developing a regular routine and to learn how to manage your new scheduled life. This arrangement is new to you and your grandchildren. This new routine will need to be massaged and tweaked as you learn what works and what doesn’t. Realize it will become more settled and easier as time goes on. I know, it doesn’t feel like it now. Breathe!
Another important strategy is to build a support network. Grandparents should reach out to friends, family members, church and community organizations to seek help and advice. Finding help with child care can be daunting. And let’s face it, help around the house could seriously reduce your stress. Alot of times, it’s who you know that are your best resources. It is also important to maintain connections with other grandparents who are raising grandchildren, either through in-person support groups or online forums. With so many of us raising children you may be surprised there is a group in your area. Check your local community for groups or programs. Start with a Senior Network or Department on Aging in your area.
Talk To Everyone
Communication is another key factor to managing multiple responsibilities. Grandparents should discuss their needs and concerns with their adult children, other family members, teachers, neighbors and other close contacts on a regular basis. Keeping the lines of communication open and honest can help avoid misunderstandings and conflicts. Plus, it will lead to greater support and understanding from others. Most people want to help. Events like this are uncomfortable. Most do not know what they can do or say. I have found people to be supportive once they feel how comfortable you are. It’s not about pity. It’s about building a strong support system for you, your family and of course, your grandchildren. We need to change negative concepts. Grandparents raising grandchildren is a reality in our world today. We can’t change the past.
Give Yourself a Pat on the Back
Finally, it is important to maintain a positive outlook and focus on the joys of grandparenting. Raising grandchildren can be a challenging and rewarding experience. Grandparents should celebrate their successes and take pride in their accomplishments. Seek out opportunities to create special memories with your grandchildren, such as planning family outings or participating in holiday traditions. Grandchildren can also participate in helping around the house, making suggestions of activities and learning to embrace the new family dynamic. Everyone is in a new role. Supporting each other from day one will truly make your relationships stronger. You may not think they know but, the children are aware of how awesome you are. Children are very perceptive and “street” smart.
Self-Care
It’s easier said then done but, making time for self-care is very important. Finding sitters to allow free time is crucial. If you are a couple on this journey you can support each other. Individual time out and breaks can surely help with the feeling of overwhelm. (Have you ever sat in your car in the drive-way?-I SO GET IT!) Find a way to exercise or do yoga. Grab a cup of coffee with a friend. Date nights are also, important. If you are single, it does make it a bit more challenging. Look for resources in your area for grandparents raising grandchildren. The agencies are usually listed under the Department on Aging or Senior Services, Children Services or various non-profits like United Way.
My Husband and I
Finding childcare was our biggest pain point. We asked our friends, local schools, churches and Care.com. My husband reached out to a contact at the local high school. We managed to find a few high school and college students we could work with. It is certainly trial and error. Finding a sitter can be down-right scary! Don’t give up. It’s the ticket to keeping you moving forward and quite frankly, sane. You need the support of childcare and the ability to have time for yourselves. It’s a must.
In addition, to having our grandchildren we also had the responsibility of caring for my father-in-law. We had an eighty plus year old, 4.5 yr. old and 11 months. You could say we needed balance!
In Conclusion
Balancing the demands of raising grandchildren with other responsibilities requires a combination of strategies, including setting priorities, building a support network, practicing self-care, communicating openly, and maintaining a positive attitude. With these tools, grandparents can successfully navigate the challenges of this important role and find fulfillment in their lives while effectively raising their grandchildren.